From: ads@mfltd.co.uk (Al Sinclair)

Subject: ABOI: physics breakthrough

Date: 28 Oct 1994 19:37:03 GMT

 Subj:   Physics breakthrough
 >
 >Scientists Discover New Element
 >
 >      The heaviest element known to science, was recently discovered by
 > physicists at the Yale's Research Center.  The element, tentatively named
 > administratium, has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number
 > of 0. However, it does have one neutron, 125 assistant neutrons 75 vice-
 > neutrons and 11 assistant vice-neutrons. This gives it an atomic mass
 > of 312. These 312 particles are held together in a nucleus by a force that
 > involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called morons.
 >
 >      Since it has no electrons, administratium is inert. However, it can
 > be detected chemically as it impedes every reaction it comes in contact
 > with.  According to the discoverers, a minute amount of administratium
 > caused a reaction to take over four days to complete, when it would normally
 > occur in less than one second.
 >
 >      Administratium has a normal life of approximately three years, at which
 > time it does not actually decay but, instead, undergoes a reorganization
 > in which assistant neutrons, vice-neutrons and assistant vice-neutrons
 > exchange places. Some studies have shown that the atomic weight usually
 > increases after each reorganization.
 >
 >      Research at other laboratories indicate that administratium occurs
 > naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate at certain points
 > such as government agencies, large corporations, universities and
 > can actually be found in the newest, best maintained buildings.
 >
 >      Scientists point out that adminitratium is known to be toxic at any
 > level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reactions
 > where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine
 > how administratium can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but
 > results to date are not promising.






Jesper Nilsson // dat92jni@ludat.lth.se or jesper@df.lth.se